Teachings From the Tree of Life, part 17: There Is Nothing Wrong With You
Boozhoo. Your frustration is so very recognizable. I think it is not very complicated though. It's fear that makes people shun you. Most people are afraid of what's out there (and inside themselves) so they choose to be ignorant, or not knowing, and puddle around in the same shallow waters their upbringers have been puddling their hole lives. It has always been that way and it will always be that way. It's in the human nature to behave like an ostrich. But you know, it's OK.
Some people, you included, are different. This means we have a choice. We always have the opportunity to choose a different tree branch to follow, how to respond to how others see and treat us. Either we keep being upset and feeling unheard all the time, or we recognize our special gift and put it to good use. The only way to do that, however, is to let go of the anger and frustration. When you do that, knowing when to end a contract becomes easier. You see things clearer.
Being different doesn't mean that we are weird. It simply means we are light years ahead of those who conform to the norms of dominant society. I do not think I am galaxies older than you. It's not a matter of how old our galaxies are. Knowing how to deal with our "social handicap," in the right here and now, is key. I could share all kinds of deep and philosophical wisdoms and platitudes with you, but I believe this is the best advice I can give you. Keep it simple, and don't be too hard on yourself.
By the way, never say sorry. There is absolutely no need to apologize for being honest and for reaching out. I truly appreciate that you are doing this. Miigwech.
Illustration: "There Is Nothing Wrong With You" ©2023 Zhaawano Giizhik