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Writer's picturezhaawano

Teachings From the Tree of Life, part 33: Don't Judge. We All Have Scars

Waagaabagaa-giizis (Leaves Turning Moon) / Manoominike-giizis (Ricing Moon) - September 30, 2024

 


Zhaawano Giizhik during Sun Dance at Gull Lake Manitoba


 

Boozhoo,


It is so easy to judge a person from a distance. To judge the "Nativeness" of someone by their outward appearance – or tribal affiliation – alone.


Despite my partially Ojibwe background I am not enrolled in any tribe. I guess that makes me someone who is not a certified Native American and therefore an easy target for the pretendian hunters...so be it. I know who I am and I'm not afraid. I lived in many places. Born on Turtle Island, from an Anglo-Dutch-Ojibwe father and a Dutch mother, moved to Europe, married, raised 2 sons, divorced, and returned to Turtle Island (both the US and Canada) and also lived in Tel Aviv, Israel. Talked to many people. Dreamed many dreams. Participated in ceremonies both in Canada and the States. Between 2015 and 2017 I lived with a gifted Ojibwe artist and tried hard to create with her a haven for homeless artists in Saskatchewan. It failed, due to the intergenerational trauma that proved to be stronger than the, in itself, powerful strength of love. Long story short, I ended up in Amsterdam, then Nijmegen, broke, mending wounds. I finally found my partner for life and am happy. I know you have scars, but I have them too. We all do.


As to the modern custom of calling out those who do not fit into the strict cultural boundaries of contemporary standards, here's what I believe. It’s impossible to build a united cultural movement while immersed in call-out culture. We lose sight of one another that way. Calling out results in separation and factions; instead of protecting our communities, it increases the toxicity of the already damaged relations that keep them together. People who use this conflictual approach, publicly denouncing and "exposing" those who don't have some sort of tribal affiliation written on their foreheads or carry cards to prove it - or worse, whose skin color is lighter than their own - think they, as champions of the truth, are rightfully protecting their cultural identity. What they really do is create more conflict and more hatred and self-shame and, thus, seriously undermine the culture and values they so desperately try to preserve.


Furthermore, by doing this you don't do good by yourself as you actually sabotage your own happiness with this unrestrained anger that is keeping you in such a firm grip. Anger can be a valuable emotion but never if it loses sight on the bigger context. The anger clouds your vision, prevents you from seeing clearly.


I hope my story resonates with you. If not, that's ok with me. Let's at least be honest to each other, in a respectful way. Having uncomfortable conversations is part of it, I guess.


Weweni,


Zhaawano

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